A classic exchange between a season ticket holder and the Cleveland Browns front office from 1974. It’s a shame that no one would have the balls to send a reply like this today. The customer is not always right.
And the response from Browns General Counsel James N. Bailey. (Found via Cleveland Scene)
Related: US is a “Nation of wusses.”
Comments on “CLEVELAND BROWNS CUSTOMER SERVICE c.1974”
Definitely not what I expected. Very funny.
Typed Correspondence on Engraved letterhead. It hurts.
So good. So very good.
Best thing I have read in 2010
What a find!
Mr. James N. Bailey had big balls!
I heard this read last week on the Tony Kornheiser Show, but they failed to mention Chief Executive Asshole, Art Modell was copied on the correspondence. Nice.
“cc: Art Modell”
I love how they made sure the owner got a look at it, too.
Being from Pittsburgh, I was ready to say “Cleveland sucks,” but this is awesome. Thanks for sharing.
This is really, really funny. Thanks for sharing it with us!
MW. I saw this the other day (maybe on Deadspin?) and almost sent it to you. Right up your alley for sure. I’m glad you shared with the ACL crew… Happy Holidays from Portland, Oregon. PS. Those Tellasons are filthy… AJ
What a relief to see that not everyone bows to the ‘whodjasue?’ society.
It is funny stuff. This works with Political bumper Stickers too. Stop light, Parking lot “excuse me! some asshole put a ____/ ____ 2012 sticker on your car!” It’s all purpose.
Now that is some fine legal representation! Very funny.
Awesome. Thanks for sharing.
If he’s still alive, I want Mr. Bailey as my attorney. Any kin to F. Lee?
Awesome, just effing classic Mike.
The second one is not signed and may have been faked… but still, very funny.
m.w. what’s always nice about your posts, is that you get it and that’s enough.
Today they would just relieve him of his season tickets, thus removing the risk :)
Great response though.
Looks like Roetzel & Andress is still around, though Dale Cox himself is not. Steve Cox still is, though: http://www.ralaw.com/attorney.cfm?id=4670. Perhaps related?
Great response. Reminds me that in the old days of working at newspapers, we had lawyers who would say when we were in the right, “let ’em sue, we’ll slaughter ’em.” When I left the business several years ago it degraded to self-censorship and settling. Newspapers still lost money, but managed to lose their balls, too.
Very nicely done. I have trained several of my customers, who are themselves lawyers, to make sure that they keep the GTFO sign and letter handy for individuals such as these. “GTFO”? Get the…oh, well you know the rest, I’m sure.
All this proves is that Browns fans were assholes back in 1974 just like today.
My reaction was first, to laugh, and secondly, to wonder whether any reply was warranted.
Best thing I have read in 2011
I’ve known a lot of lawyers at Roetzel and Andress and, seriously, the letter could have been written by any one of them. Take yourselves a little seriously, guys? The general counsel has my deepest respect.
Name on the letterhead is Cletus. That is funny all by itself.
OMG…Large and Brass. A wonderful and rare combination.
James N. Bailey was one funny f*%ker :)
What I’ve learned after too many years of dealing with the public; “The customer is always right, some of the time.”
Stinks to think that someone would loose their job over a response like this now.
I’m guessing the intent of the Cox memo was a planned setup to create a scenario where multiple fans could start to make claims about getting hit in the eye with the paper plane. The wording is too complex for something this simple. Cox was / is a low-life ambulance-chaser with really nice letterhead to write this sort of asinine memo.
Classic! Nuf said….
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